Shit Morons Say ... when lying.

The Wall Street Journal, Asia posted about an interview with an MBC Producer. The producer in question works on the "news magazine" that aired the piece of tripe called Shocking Reality but didn't want to be named.

For some reason the producer just can't understand why the foreigners are upset. He went on to lie and claim that the report adequately pointed out that problems occur in only a few cases. Something which WSJ was quick to point out wasn't true. Someone from the Korean "media" lied. What a shocker.

I was going to write more about it and vent my spleen but decided not to. The Dokdo Times did a much better job than I would have. :)

Shit Foreigners say ... about Korean BS.

"I can't believe MBC would air this."

"I am surprised to see them (MBC) air this."

I know I have talked about this already but I think it bears repeating. Lately I have been reading posts and comments on various sites discussing the latest racist BS to come out of MBC and I encountered several comments like those.

I am surprised that people (foreigners) who purport to live in South Korea are surprised by the drek MBC put out. Have they lived in a fucking bubble their whole time there? Do I have to steal Bill Maher's life Inside the Bubble schtick to talk about these people?

I lived there for 10 years and racist crap like this came as NO surprise. The year before I left there was similar crap painting all expat's teaching English as evil drug using rapists who are there to corrupt Koreans and screw around. There was the CYJ English ad claiming most foreigners have aids, many are gay, they want our women.

For people to be actually surprised about this they have to have been living in a bubble. Talk about it made the rounds on expat websites. I even heard about it from Korean co-workers. You had to have your head buried in the sand pretty deep not to hear something about it.

Then you have the people who start rambling on that "Not all Korean's think that way." Of course not all of them do. But a LOT of them do. I would be willing to bet my own money that it is a majority of them.

If the whole Mad Cow bugaboo showed us anything it is that Koreans are extremely susceptible to what the media, or authority figures, tell them. Even when it flies in the face of reality.

I can remember butting heads with students, both adult and younger, over things they believed that denied reality. One episode that sticks out most in my head is how vehement many were that there are only 6 continents. It didn't matter how much proof you showed them that there are 7 continents they REFUSED to believe it. Why? A Korean teacher taught them that there were only 6. I was just a foreign teacher and therefore not as reliable. When I talked with some Korean co-workers about it they held the same belief for the same reason.

That is just the reality of life in Korea. Hopefully it will change over time but I wouldn't hold my breath while waiting.

The Layover: Los Angeles

God Damn! I am watching The Layover: Los Angeles, the latest Anthony Bourdain show. He is in Korea Town being taught where to go by Roy Choi. (Korea Town LA has the LARGEST number of Koreans outside of Seoul.) They met at Ham Ji Park and my taste bud's memory started to go into overload.

The banchan looked good, but like Chef Choi said it isn't the same as being in Korea. The samkyubsal brought a nostalgic tear to my eye. But the kamjatang was a kick in the balls to remind me of something I miss. :(  I REALLY miss kamjatang.

He then went on to have chicknangmyoung. Now I never really got into nangmyoung. Something about the texture turned me off. But it tasted ok.

They even show pojangmachas and drink makkeolli!!! I am seriously missing Korea right now. Yeah, I admitted it. There are things I miss. :) The slurping, I didn't miss. ;)

I ate at a Korean restaurant in Halifax almost 2 years to the day I returned home. That will require another post. Anyway, I digress. Watch the show if you haven't. If you have, watch it again! ;)

Lousy Korea

It is kind of funny. Thinking about MBC's racist BS got me thinking about Lousy Korea.

Lousy Korea basically did what the Korean media does to foreigners. But she did it to Koreans. She took things that aggravated her about Korea and Koreans, focused on them, and exaggerated them to pursue her narrative.

At times she was hilarious. At times she did cross the line into making racist comments. Unlike the media you knew she was doing it tongue in cheek. You knew it was meant as comedy, as well as some heavy duty venting, and not to take it all seriously. Well, anyone with a brain and the ability to understand sarcasm knew it.

That left some "foreigners" and a lot of Koreans out. Her blog drove the KKKlan at Korea Sentry apeshit. Which is a big part of what eventually led to her shutting down the site. Death threats from whack jobs.

If you are reading this LK I hope life is treating you well.

The Way of the Bow

Korean Adventure (May 16, 2003 Chautauqua)

   In the past few weeks, I have been trying to find something to do with my spare time. I thought that this week, I would examine the possibility of emulating Robin Hood.

    Korean archery is called "Gungdo," or the "way of the bow." It has its roots in the Hwarang Knights of the Silla Kingdom (57 AD - 935 AD) and was an art practiced by aristocrats to cultivate mental and physical discipline.

    The martial art is governed by nine precepts that emphasize Korean Confucian philosophy and proper decorum, such as having a mind and body as straight as an arrow. This kind of clear mental focus is required to hit a target positioned 145 meters away.

    Before firing an arrow, a student is required to learn how to brace the bow and to hold it with the proper grip. The correct procedure is to draw the bow as if "pushing a high mountain and pulling a tiger's tail."

    Two types of bows are used: the modern laminated bow and the traditional Korean composite horn bow.

Two kinds of arrows are used: carbon and bamboo.

A teardrop shaped thumb ring is used in the technique of the "Mongolian draw." 

A bow cover is used to protect the bow while in storage, and it doubles as a waist sash/quiver.

    Before firing the first arrow of the day, tradition dictates the archer bow to the target and say, "I am learning the bow." The other archers reply, "Have many hits." The first hit is of special importance. The archer receives congratulations from the other archers, and is required to provide refreshments and drinks for all.

    A perfect score is to hit the target with five consecutive shots. The achievement is recorded as to time and date, and the archer receives his "muho," or archer's pen name during a ritual ceremony.

    The process of making a bow is very involved, and can take up to a year. Traditional materials include water buffalo horn, bamboo, mulberry, oak, sinew, birch bark, and fish bladder glue. Each procedure has "a season."

    Like other martial arts in Korea, the "dan" system of ranking is used. Competitions are held several times a year, so that rankings, or "dan" levels, can be determined. The first dan level that a person can reach is when he hits the target 25 out of 45 tries, and only two levels of advancement are allowed each year.

    The competitions are held in a pavilion hall decorated with a sign (of Chinese characters) that means "righteous room." The shooting positions are in a covered area. The plywood targets are covered with hard rubber and are 2.67 metres high and 2 metres wide, tilted back 15 degrees.

    It is possible to compete in both team and individual events. If you hit the target, and your arrow doesn't go past the target, it's a hit. Judges determine just what kind of score you receive, and trophies and certificates are awarded.

   So, to recap, I can spend my spare time learning to fight with a sword, I can play with dolls, I can watch movies all day, or I can pretend to be William Tell. Next time, I will discuss the option of getting married.

What the ... Shocking Reality 2?!?!?!?

It didn't take long for someone to do up an animation poking fun at MBC and their shoddy reporting.

Well done stvwrd. Well done. :)

The DVD Room

Korean Adventure (May 2, 2003 Chautauqua)

   So far, in my quest for something to do with my free time, I have considered hacking up defenseless bamboo with a sword, and playing with dolls. I now turn to a more passive form of recreation, that unique Korean creation, the DVD room.

   I think I have informed you before of the PC room, where young Korean males go to play violent computer games, and smoke their brains out. Adjacent to many of them are DVD rooms, where they take their girlfriends to enjoy... a movie.

   They are found on the upper floors of any average office building. Instead of a single space, the area is divided up into a number of (nearly) soundproof cubicles.  The fee for the movie rental is about $5.00. There are snacks available, including popcorn.

   Customers can view their selection on a flat screen that takes up one entire wall, while relaxing in huge comfy chairs or sofas. There is a central area with all the choices, and a desk where the attendant keeps an eye on all the players for the various rooms.

   One of the attractions of the DVD is it makes it possible to view Korean films. They only have English subtitles, but some Korean films are well worth it. They alternate between "art house films" and other, more mainstream, selections.

   The former are described as "fairly realistic films about ordinary people's lives." The latter genre includes comedies, romances, and (above all in recent times) gangster films.

   Korean gangster films differ from what westerners are used to in such features as "The Godfather" or "Goodfellas." Korean gangsters are seen as "less educated," and so "it's easy to make fun of them," says fan Anna Park, a Seoul University student. The typical offering is more of a "madcap screwball comedy," than a gritty depiction of the violent predator of the western versions.

   One aspect of the DVD room should be kept in mind, though. They are generally associated with, in popular imagination, activities that go beyond simply watching movies. According to the Pusan Pop Culture Guide (www.pusanweb.com), "video rooms are notorious in Korea as a place where young couples go to have sex."

   I am always careful about where my eyes are when I go from the lobby to my room. The possibility of being confronted with an embarrassing situation is only a small drawback once the movie has started. Big comfy chair, Dolby surround sound, and a huge screen to see it all. What more could any male couch potato want?

   Stay tuned...

   Some of the information in this article was obtained from a "Korea Herald" article by contributing writer Jeremy Garlick.