Same Racist Shit Different Year.

Oh Korea, you never fail to show your ass to the world. When asked by people at home if I would ever go back to Korea to live my answer is no. I just couldn't put up with the racist and bigoted bull shit again. If I hadn't used the internet as an outlet to vent when I was there I probably would have lost it. I would never willingly put myself in that situation again. Hopefully, things will change there but looking at some of the current headlines it is a long way off.

An American teacher was turned down by a school for the fact he was black. In fact, that was the reason they told his recruiter and was TEXTED to him.

Sadly, this still doesn't surprise me when talking about South Korea. Nor does the response of the Korean Human Rights Committee.

An official at the National Human Rights Commission of Korea acknowledged that there is no anti-discrimination law in Korea and it would be difficult to take any punitive action in most of the cases.

It would be difficult so we won't even try to do anything about it. Way to protect human rights. It was a better response that a guy I know got when he contacted them back in 2006 about CYJ English Academy's racist ad.  He was told that while it was discriminatory it wasn't discriminatory enough. These are the same fucktards that said banning the use of cell phones in schools was a violation of students Human Rights. What the kimchi?!?!?!?

The official from Butler Child Academy in Sangdo Seoul made all the usual comments to excuse their actions. The children would be scared of him. We had to fill the position quickly and had already found someone. (Yet he was texted his rejection on his way to the interview.) They then fell back on a variation of  an over used Korean cop out ...

“I suspect that there was some miscommunication between him and the recruiter.”

Ah, miscommunication and passing the buck. It was the recruiters fault. It was miscommunication. The recruiter shouldn't have told him the racist reason we gave. It wasn't our fault. Mind you calling it miscommunication is a step up from the over used misunderstanding. Which I found Korean's tend to use when they had lied and you had caught them.

It seems like Korea hasn't advanced that much since I left, at least when it comes to racism. While I could visit there it isn't a place I could live in again. Or even advise others to live in.

What the ... copy cats?!?!?

I had thought that I mentioned the culture of copying that exists in South Korea long ago. It turns out that while I can say I did it was really a reference to a great post by Dokdo is Ours. What made me think of it now? A message from a student.

In 2011 I got a smart phone. One of my old students mentioned a program to me called Kakao Talk. According to her it was a great Korean invention that would change the way people used smart phones to communicate. I didn't have the heart to ask her if she had heard of instant messanger or Facebook. I just chalked it down to the usual Nationalistic zeal you see in Koreans. A zeal which often causes them to ignore facts and try to rewrite history. But I digress.

I installed it and it was cute. Nothing really new in the world outside of Korea. I still use it today to keep in touch with some friends and old students. I like the ability to share pictures and videos as well as text.

Last year the same person introduced me to Kakao Story. It is a decent program for sharing photos and stories. When she talked about it being innovative and a game changer I could see where she was coming from. Mind you, I had never used Instagram.

Yesterday I installed Instagram on my phone. Or should I say Kakao Story in English? Wow. Kakao Story is such a rip off of it that it isn't funny. Just when you thought you could believe that someone made something original it turns out to be just another rip off. And not a rip off that actually improved on what Instagram does.

Celebrating The Lunar new Year

Korean Adventure (March 7, 2003 Chautauqua)

Since I have been living and working in Korea, I have been able to celebrate the new year twice. On January 1st, I welcomed 2003, and on February 1st, I welcomed the year of the goat.
There are twelve different animals assigned to various years, including the rat, the dragon, and the cow. I was born in 1959, the year of the pig. According to my horoscope, I will be more of a homebody this year. So, no change.
Our calendar, the Gregorian, is used throughout Asia, but there are still those who rely on a lunar calendar to calculate the best time to celebrate ancient rites, such as the lunar new year.
The Gregorian calendar ignores the moon and adds leap days to recalculate the solar year. The lunar calendar, like the Islamic calendar, ignores the sun. The lunisolar calendar, exemplified by Chinese and Jewish calendars, adds leap months every three years. It can make you dizzy trying to keep them straight.
One of the main parts of the Korean tradition is something they call "jesa," which is a ritual performed in homes asking the residing spirit for blessings.
An altar table is set, and then the head of the household lights incense, pours liquor into a glass, and then into a bowl. He then bows twice to the ancestral spirit. His family follows suit, and the head reads the "chuk mun," or ritual address.
This is done three times, and a small amount of food is eaten to signify acceptance of the ancestors' symbolic blessing.
Some Christians have denounced it as a form of worship that they cannot condone. They also object to the drinking of liquor, as well as the increasingly popular tradition of visiting a fortune teller.
Such talk would have certainly brought down severe punishment in the 19th century, when over 300 believers lost their lives. Christianity has become close to a religious majority nowadays, and churches can be found on every street corner.
The struggle between the old (Confucianism) and the new (Christianity) can be very divisive of families, and compromises are having to be made. Many people are trying to find their own way of celebrating that will include everyone.
Some people simply say they are honoring their ancestors, and New Years Day is the appropriate occasion. It is part of a break from any orthodox religion and an effort to tailor their own beliefs and practices as they see fit.
Mainly, it seems to me, it is about family. Many Koreans have no religion at all, and don't perform the ceremony, but they do take the time to visit their home towns and pay their respects.
As the country changes and modernizes, some things will no doubt be lost. Maintaining something that is their own, may help a lot of Koreans retain a sense of national identity, and pave the way for better understanding and (one hopes) peace.
I got a lot of the information for this article from the Korea Herald, and a story by staff reporter Andrew Petty.

Inside Korea

Korean Adventure (November 1, 2002 Chautauqua)

I subscribe to an English-language newspaper called the Korea Herald. It gives mostly political and economic news, and a view of what some aspects of Korean life is like. There are profiles of Korean public figures, discussions of artistic endeavours, and bits of traditional lore/folkways.

In the political arena, one of the main points of interest for the past year has been the presidential election, due in December. There are two main parties, the Grand National Party, and the Millennium Democratic Party, which was created about six years ago by the sitting President, Kim Dae-jung.

President Kim received the Nobel Peace Prize in 2000 for his "Sunshine Policy" of reconciliation with North Korea. This process was stalled for a time after the election of George W. Bush, who included North Korea in his so-called "Axis of Evil." It is only recently that things have gotten back on track (pun intended). The two Koreas are building a rail link through the de-militarized zone, and working on a permanent re-unification village, where long-separated families can meet.

President Kim has had a very bad year. His administration is under investigation for corrupt practices, and two of his sons are now in jail for profiteering. The president is not eligible to run for re-election, but the voters are turning away from his party in droves. The present candidate has spent more time fighting off challenges from within his party than campaigning. Whether the party will survive to the election is still up in the air.

The candidate from the Grand National Party hasn't had an easy time, either. His son has been accused of draft-dodging, and there have been acrimonious exchanges when the law-makers meet in session. At one time, there were so many charges and counter-charges flying around, the Herald had a "Scandal Round-Up" section in the paper.

News from the north is scanty. There are tales of millions of people starving to death, which makes the need for reconciliation that much more acute. One story said that people were foraging in the hills for anything edible, and others were attempting to cultivate seaweed. The same day that story appeared, another one was printed that said the south's First Lady had sent up a shipment of soccer balls. The thought of starving people being given sporting equipment...

A recent article outlined South Korea's high costs and low quality of life. It is the eighth most expensive place to rent an apartment (three bedrooms): 1,580USD/month, as compared to: Taiwan 1,440USD; China 1,460USD; America 1,675USD; and Japan 2,160USD. Office space runs 523USD/year for one square meter (ninth highest), compared with 245USD in China, 452USD in America, and 486USD in Taiwan.

Korea ranks 22nd out of 131 countries in terms of living expenses, while Korean households earmark 4.9% of their budget for education of children, the highest ratio in the world, followed by the U.S., 2.4%; Japan, 2.1%; and Britain, 1.4%. Despite the high cost of living, the 2002 quality of life index for Korea stood at 5.64, ranking 32nd out of 49 countries and trailing Austria (9.77), the U.S. (8.92), and Japan (6.15). The hourly wage of Korea's manufacturing sector workers averaged 8.13USD as of 2000, ranking 21st of 29 countries and trailing Germany (22.29USD), Japan (22USD), and the U.S. (19.86USD).

A lot of Koreans drive their own cars, and they spend a lot of money customizing them to the particular owner's taste. They also have very good, and cheap, transit systems. I do not have a car, but I can get around the country very well for very little cost. It comes in handy when the freeways are jammed to zip past in comfort on the train.

Mostly everybody has a cell phone. It is not unusual to see a couple walking down the street, both of them talking away, but not to each other. The phones are cunning little items, and some of them have special headsets that make it look like wires are trailing out of someone's ears. A lot of people tap away at their hand sets, sending text messages. The rings are modern pop tunes/classical pieces that almost make up for it when they ring in the middle of a crowded movie theatre. Sometimes I think I'm the only person in Korea who doesn't own one. Even my kids have them!

I don't want this to be taken the wrong way, but sometimes Koreans remind me of big, happy children - easily mollified by bright, shiny objects - but with a capacity to work harder than we are used to in the west. They work hard, and they play even harder. They have the confidence that will surely be rewarded, and it will be more than deserved.
------------------------------------------------
I remember the GNP leader Lee Hoi-chang once being quoted that he was shocked, shocked, at the opposing parties' corrupt practices. The very next week he was under investigation, and he eventually retired from politics.
Despite it's very high standard of living, it was fairly economical to live in South Korea. Mostly because the school paying for your living expenses and health care.
I sometimes wish I was back there earning a living instead of begging for a job, any job back here in the world.
I didn't get a cell phone until my third year there. I probably should have gotten one earlier. I resisited as long as I could, but it just became too impractible not to have one.

Shopping In Korea

Korean Adventure (June 21, 2002 Chautauqua)

Shopping in Korea can be an interesting experience. There are many modern western-style supermarkets, including Wal-Mart, Costco, and Homeplus. It is a great temptation to stick to these convenient mega-stores. They carry most of the goods we are used to, and the prices are fairly reasonable. There are subtle differences, though.

The newly constructed (ca. 2008) Busan Fish Market

There is an entire aisle devoted to seaweed. It is dried and compressed into sheets of various sizes, from postage stamp to full human length. Koreans mainly use it to make "kimbap", which is like sushi. You lay out some seaweed, cover it with rice, and then various fillings like meat, fish, or vegetables. You then roll it up into a cylinder, approximately 12"long and 1" in diameter. Slice into pieces, and that is a meal. I enjoy having kimbap for lunch every once in a while. The price is more reasonable than the usual hamburger and fries, and it is filling, too.
There are also differences in the kinds of vegetables that are available. Koreans' favorite accompaniment to any (and every) meal is kimchi. It's a spicy cabbage. I’ve seen it made from a variety of vegetables, but the cabbage is my favorite. There is usually an island in the produce section where they make and display the various kimchis.

There is a lot of fresh fish available; any kind you could imagine, and some you could not. Squid and octopus are big sellers, and they are usually displayed live (in tanks) so you can be sure it's fresh.

Yes, the department stores are convenient, and have just about everything you could want, but the real "Korean Experience" demands that you go out and shop at the open air markets that are in every corner of the city. Some of them specialize in dry goods, furniture, food, what have you. There are some very good deals to be had, if you know where to look. A person can spend a whole day just wandering around, seeing the many sights and sounds. Buying something becomes a secondary consideration.


There are some interesting corners that some people might want to avoid. Really fresh meat and poultry in the form of caged ducks, chickens, and rabbits should not be confused with pet stores. I remember walking around the Chil-sung market (in Daegu) with my friends last summer. We rounded a corner deep inside the market, far from the main thoroughfare. There, laid out for display was a freshly slaughtered dog. How fresh do you ask? The muscles were still twitching.

Yes, the Koreans do eat dog. Some of the people I have talked to do not see anything wrong with it, and are nonplussed by some western reactions. There was even some talk of setting up dog-meat booths at the World Cup venues in order to introduce foreigners to this local delicacy. One foreigner, a teacher I believe, wrote a letter to the Korea Herald, denouncing this intention in a near-hysterical rage. I have not heard if the booths were set up. Maybe more PR-conscious heads intervened.

These open-air markets have been a staple of the Korean life-style for hundreds of years. Many of the structures look as if they have been there that long. People continue to flock to them, just as many go to the more modern establishments. This combination of the old and the new, makes for a fascinating experience for the traveller willing to explore beyond the beaten path.

My First Column

When I went to Korea for my second year, I began a column reporting on teaching and travelling in Korea and the surrounding countries. These stories first appeared in The Chautauqua, which circulates in Central Alberta. I'll be reprinting these columns here and in Stig's Silly Walks. The stuff about Korea will appear here, and the stuff about other countries will be found on SSW, unless I'm channeling Flint that day, and do the opposite.

Teaching English in Korea (February 1, 2002 Chautauqua)

By Alan E. Johnson

In the summer of the year 2000, I was working as a security guard in Calgary. I had graduated from university, but was unable to find a job that suited me. Security paid the bills, and gave me time to read. But it was a dead end, and I had been looking around for something better for quite a while. I had tried to get jobs teaching English in Europe and China, but they fell through.
Then I met another guard who was going to Korea. He gave me a handout that answered questions about applying for a job, the various procedures to go through to work in another country, and an address to contact a recruiter. A lot of the work can be done via the internet, which makes it easy for people in different countries to communicate quickly.
In no time, I had a variety of offers from recruiters in Canada, the U.S, and Korea. Eventually I settled on what seemed to be the most straightforward of the offers, and got my papers together. I had to submit copies of my university transcripts, a certified copy of my diploma ( the Korean Embassy in Vancouver handles that), and a copy of my passport. Koreans put great importance on a person's appearance, so a photograph is a must. No one seemed put off by my appearance, and a contract was faxed to me.
There is a website run by the Canadian government that offers some advice about working in Korea. They make it clear that a lot of what you do is at your own risk. Koreans don't see contracts as something that they have to adhere to completely. They place more emphasis on the personal agreements that people make face to face. A contract is just a guide that can be ignored if better terms can be arranged.
There was a lot of work to do before I was ready to leave the country. I had to quit my job ( that was a lot of fun!), put some of my things into storage, sell the items I no longer needed, and move the rest to my folks'. My parents were an invaluable source of help and inspiration in this. They were very happy to see me get out of the rut I had been in. It was a very emotional farewell.
I must admit to a certain amount of trepidation as I flew half-way around the world. Wandering around the airport in Seoul ( my pick-up was late), I wondered if I had done the right thing. That feeling never really left me the whole time I was there. A new teacher is not really given any extensive training - at least I wasn't - before being placed in a classroom.

Taegu from the southwest. Taken from the "mountain" behind my first con-apt.

The school I landed at was in the city of Taegu, the third largest city in Korea ( approx. 2.5 - 3 million population). It was part of a chain of schools that go by the name of "Wonderland". When I arrived, there were three other foreigners there. I was rooming with one of them, another Canadian by the name of Phil. He gave me a lot of useful information, but he was wrapped up in personal problems, and I had to learn a lot of things for myself.
I was given a couple of days to watch the other teachers in various classes before I was given my own students. There are no words to describe the fear that grabs you in that situation. A lot of what I did in those early days was made up as I went along. To tell the truth, Taegu Wonderland is not a very good school. Their curriculum is poorly organized, and there is not a lot of support for a new teacher to rely on. A person has to look inside for the resources he/she needs.

Taegu Wonderland (3rd and 4th floors)

The main reason that foreigners are there is to provide a resource for the children to listen to. All I had to do, really, is go into the classroom, start talking, and not stop until class was over. The children needed to hear English being spoken in order to get used to the rhythms and be given corrections about pronunciation. The hard rules about grammar points and spelling would come from the Korean staff.
The Korean teachers were young, pretty women. There were four kindergarten teachers, who did not speak very much English at all. Their task was to get the children used to the school rules, where the bathrooms were, when lunch is; the usual day-care sort of tasks.
The pre-schoolers (cute as buttons, all of them) came to the school in the morning, and were there from 10:00 until 2:30 in the afternoon. At that time, the elementary and middle school kids came in. Those classes went from 3:00 in the afternoon until 7:30 at night. The same kids were not there all that time. There were three sets of kids who changed "shifts" every 90 minutes. In those 90 minutes they had two classes, one with a Korean teacher, and one with a foreigner.

Changwon Wonderland in building indicated.

There were a variety of textbooks that were used, and the Korean teacher usually controlled how fast or how slow the books were used. After a while, I began to rely less and less on these books, and on my own resources. The books became a guide as to what I was teaching, and I grew more confident about discarding the less helpful parts and giving the children more substantial instruction.
In the time I taught in Wonderland, I saw a complete turnover in the foreign staff. The teachers who were there when I arrived moved on when their contracts were completed, and sometimes before. The act of leaving early came to be known as "doing a runner". I knew five different teachers who for one reason or another decided to move on before their contracts were fulfilled. Some were a bit overwhelmed by it all, and decided to return to the "real world". Some were merely taking some time to travel and experience a bit before they took up "real" jobs.
Living over there became easier as I became accustomed to travelling around the city by myself. I really began to enjoy my time when the new teachers arrived to replace the old. We formed a gang, and we relied on each other to help us through the tough times. We found that we could get together and talk shop, take instruction in the Korean language, and generally have some fun. It was a lot like being back in school. There was less "responsibility" in our profession, and we were able to have some fun with it.
Exploring the country, experiencing a different culture, is just one of the perks of the job. I was able to see the remnants of a civilization that flourished at the same time Christ walked the earth. I was also able to see first hand one of the few remaining places that the Cold War is still being fought.
The Korean people are very friendly once you get past their initial reserve, and I made some good friends that I am looking forward to seeing once I return. Yes, I am returning - if I can sort through the many jobs available - and I hope to see the people who I came to regard as my second family. One of the jokes I heard before I left was that I would probably bring back a little Korean wife. That didn't happen, but who knows who'll come back to Canada with me the next time? I'm working on it.

Well, there you have it. My first year in Korea, encapsulated in just so many words.
It left out just how difficult those first months were, and just how bad it was, working for Wonderland. I came this close to doing a runner myself, but I stuck it out and was glad I did. By the time the year was over, I began to feel comfortable in the classroom and in Korea.

What the ... justice 2?!?!?

I just finished reading an article on Korea Beat. It was an update on a previous story about a bus driver in trouble with the law. His crime, he stopped someone from molesting a student and attacking an older woman on the bus. Oh, and evidently not paying blood money to the boys family.

He was actually sentenced to prison time in the original case. It was a good example of why you don't get involved in anything in Korea.

On appeal the prison time was tossed but the judge still sentenced him to 6 months of prison time and 2 years of probation. The judges reasoning

The trial judge sentenced him to six months in prison and two years of probation, saying that “although there are mitigating circumstances the victim was badly injured and no settlement has been reached with his family.”

Yes, the judge actually said part of the reason for the punishment is that the blood money wasn't paid. What doesn't pay in South Korea is to help others when they are being attacked or raped. Mitigating cirumstances ... the "victim" was sexually assaulting a girl and then attacked a woman who stopped him. Mitigating circumstances ... what the kimchi?!?!?

Blood money and the way the courts and cops try to actually enforce it make South Korea look like a country of fucktards who care more about money than what is right.

Bulguksa

Flint's recent post about a visit to a Korean temple inspired me to share some photos of Bulguksa, arguably the best site to visit in Korea. I've been there many times, and I've always enjoyed the view of its facade.

I think most people will agree that if you seen one Korean temple, you've seen them all. Bulguksa is the one to see.

It, and nearby Sokkuram Grotto are not only National Treasures, but UNESCO World Heritage sites.

Bulguksa is in the hills above Kyoungju, which I visited in the spring of 2001, during my first year in Korea. It was close to Buddha's birthday, so there were a lot of paper lanterns being hung.

Around the same time, the cherry blossoms are in bloom, and it is very beautiful.
One spring a group of us rented bicycles and rode around the resort area, Beomeo Lake.
But I think the best time of year to see Bulguksa is in the fall when the trees are turning all colours.

Spectacular.

Nearby, and further up into the hills, is Sokkuram Grotto, which features a stone statue of Buddha set into the hillside.

But even this site is not free from signage containing bad English.

The beginning of the third paragraph reads: "A glass wall has been set up in front of it so that the inner portion may be outside."
I guess they thought you need a laugh after climbing up all that way.

Shit Koreans Say ... about understanding culture.

"You must understand Korean culture."

"You don't understand Korean culture."

This is kind of an offshoot of the last Shit Koreans Say. The above comments are often made by Koreans when they do something wrong and you catch them. When they either can't or don't want to explain something. Or when they are wrong and know it. Or as a commenter pointed out in the last post they claim something they did wrong in another country is "A Korean thing."

I can't find a link to the article I saw several years back but I did find a copy of it on a website. It is titled "A Korean father's lesson on raising cane." The father tried to pull the culture card. Interesting quote from his lawyer.

"The father didn't realize he was subject to Canadian laws governing assault nor did he know that his form of discipline was illegal."

Yeah. Right. Someone should have told his client that he MUST UNDERSTAND CANADIAN CULTURE. And then beat him 300 times with a stick and tell him to accept the mystery.

What the ... placebo?!?!?

I wasn't going to chime in on the subject of the Korean government deciding to not require HIV tests for "entertainers" while still require it for E-2 Visa holders, aka English teachers. What could I add that hasn't been said? Tharp42 said it best when he called them 'fuckwitts'. I might have dared the ire of the morons and said ricetards but other than that what else could be added?

Then I read this post on Extra! Korea about a 19 year old Korean girl (19 Western or Korean I don't know.) who had unprotected sex with 20 KOREAN men even though she KNEW she is HIV positive. Why unprotected sex? Because the men DID NOT want to use condoms! What the kimchi?

I can't recall how many times I have heard this about Korean men. They don't like to use condoms and will INSIST on not using them when asked. Whether by girls friends or hookers. I have heard it from men and women. Whether in Korea or on sex junkets to other countries. It still boggles my mind. (Mind you when you have Korean doctors saying kimchi prevents STD's you know where some of the stupidity is coming from.)

Then I read another post by Extra! Korea. It talked about a survery by the Women's Human Rights Commission of Korea that showed that nearly 1/3 of Korean teenagers (female) asked would consider exchanging sex for money.

“Wonjo kyoje” more commonly known in English as compensated dating is how most of these girls find their "John's". or should I say "Kim's"? The girls use the internet to find "clients", usually in chat rooms or internet dating sites. This is a problem in both Korea and Japan, and has been in the news off and on as long as I was in Korea.

Guess how the HIV positive girl mentioned above found her 20 "Kim's"? You got it, through these sites.

The Korean government will focus on E-2 Visa holders as being problem, perpetuating the vilification that is going on in the Korean "media", in the name of placating parents while the REAL problem goes ignored. How do we know it is meant as a placebo? Some fucktard from the Ministry of Education, Science, and Technology said;

"The continuation does not mean the government regards foreign teachers to be HIV positive or have the potential of transmission ― it is just intended to assure the parents."

We don't think the foreign teachers are a problem but we are doing it anyway to keep the parents happy? It isn't the foreign teachers that are cruising the internet picking up your daughters to fuck for money. It isn't the foreign teachers who are giving or contracting HIV from your daughters. It is KOREAN men! MinGuk please! Wake the fuck up!

Somehow Tharp42 saying "Can Kim Jong-il just go ahead and nuke this place once and for all?" doesn't seem as harsh as it first did.

You know you are bored when ...

... you actually read a blog post about Kim YuNa's break with Brian Orser AND then click on a further link to an article.

I was bored waiting the 10 minutes for the Daily Show to download and logged into The Marmot's Hole. After skimming 2 posts I started skimming the third one titled "Brian Orser Gets Canned". Ok, I admit the only reason I started skimming the post was because I misread it in my boredom and thought it said "Brian Orser Gets Caned". I wanted to see why he was being caned and by who. Oh well.

Then, because I still had minutes to kill and nothing better to do I hit the Forbes link and skimmed their article about the subject. But it paid off because I read something that made me chuckle. Kim YuNa said:

Do you think it's really true that my mother decided on her own to part ways with the coach? I'm no longer a child.

You are a Korean female who is 20 years old. Of course your mother still decides things for you. :)

Sounds harsh? Well, that has been my experience in South Korea. I have known a lot of Koreans, not just women, who are told what to do by their parents. Even when it comes to marriage.

One Korean woman I worked with my 1st year seemed very liberated. She was around 30 and single. She didn't have a boyfriend and had no interest in getting married OR having kids. She hated kids, which is why she taught adults. Then I went home for a month.

2 weeks after I was back in Korea, and at another job, I got an invitation ... to her wedding. 6 weeks before she had no boyfriend let alone a fiance. What happened? Her mother. Her mother decided enough was enough it was time for her to get married. She was introduced to a guy and told she would marry him. Like a good piece of chattel err daughter she obeyed. Now she is married, with child and very unhappy.

I have been told, by Koreans, that this stems from their neo-Confucian culture. It is the child's duty to obey the wishes of their parent. Even if it is something they don't want to do. If they don't do what their parents want they are bad.

Korean parents often do make decisions for their children, even when they are adults, and the children dutifully obey. Which is why YuNa's declaration that she wasn't a child had me envisioning a teenager having a tantrum saying they weren't a child anymore.

Dealing with Management

A useful tip from the Seminar for Foreign Language Academies concerns dealing with the higher ups.

In many ways this is good advice wherever you work. If you have a problem with management don't confront them publicly. If you want to question a practice or policy don't do it publicly. It is considered bad form to question the higher ups decisions in public. They will consider it a challenge to their authority and an affront to their dignity. Which in the East means they lose face.

If you have a problem or question talk about it with your boss one on one. It may not get you anywhere but it won't cause them to lose face.

Now, based on my Hagwon experiences, this isn't always extended by management to the employees but it usually is. Of course it doesn't stop people from saying shit when you aren't there. ;)

Planning and Notification

Some more information people going to Korea to work and live should know about courtesy of the Seminar for Foreign Language Academies. Beware of poor planning and notification. (Something I warned about in a previous post.)

I find it funny that they tried pawning this lack of professionalism in a workplace on culture. One thing they failed to mention is that MANY times the Koreans WILL be aware of the changes. Maybe a week or more in advance. No one tells the FOREIGNER until the last minute. I don't know about you but to me that sounds more like an unprofessional workplace or idiocy. But Koreans consider it to be a "cultural difference."

However, it is a GREAT warning to give people who are coming to Korea. EXPECT things to change at the last minute. Often literally.

Expect to have to come up with ideas to teach a class with kids of several different levels of ability as the bell rings for class.

Expect to be told what you will be teaching for intensive classes, or even regular classes, at any moment.

Don't get angry ... it is cultural. Try and work it to your advantage.

Shebal

Another Flint & Stig rip-off.

(to the tune of "She Bop")

We-hell-I see them every day in their pink outer-wear.
With their man-purse and their vacant slack-jawed glare.
Hey, they're not thinking of what they say,
They're looking at - Hey! - My way?!
Oop - she bal.

Do I wanna punch them when they all stare?
Huh, yea, I wanna go and throw them ev'rywhere!
Hey, that son-of-a-bitch said that I am slime.
He said I'm utter crap
And that I'm a crime.
Oop - she bal - she bal.

She bal -- he bal -- a wae gook,
I bal -- you bal -- a -- they mook,
Be bal -- Be bal -- a -- lu -- she bal,
I hope he will understand,
She bal -- he bal -- a -- wae gook,
I bal -- you bal -- a -- they mook,
Oo -- oo -- she bal -- she bal -- she bal.

(whistle along here... )

Hey, hey - they say I better go learn some names.
Because I can't understand all their Dokdo claims.
No, I won't worry, and I won't fret.
Ain't no law against me yet.
Oop - she bal - she bal.

She bal -- he bal -- a wae gook....

What the ..... silver hair?

So I am sitting at my desk starting my 3 hour break. A co-worker is sitting beside me. he is playing a game on his computer. Another co-worker comes in and starts chatting at us in English and Korean. (They are Korean.) She tells him in Korean that she sees a white hair or two. Then she proceeds to start grooming his hair by pulling the white hairs out.

20 minutes later she is still pulling out white hairs. He is keeping them in a small pile to the side on his desk. She actually asks me to help her. I decline.

25 minutes later she is finished and he has a nice little stack of white hairs.

What the f ... I mean kimchi did I just witness?

He is married, she isn't. Was this some sort of friendship ritual? They have a little something something on the side? Did I witness a form of skinship? Hairship?

What the .... Cultural Tips?!?!?!

Two years ago I noticed a web site. It was put up either by or for EPIK. Basically, it was meant to provide cultural tips for people coming to Korea for the first time. Much like the tips that EPIK put in the booklets they gave to new teachers.

After getting through the bad English and horrible numbering I was left wondering just what the hell was Korean culture and what wasn't. The tips ranged from good to bad to what the Kimchi?





According to the "culture tips" the following are all considered cultural when dealing with Koreans; Rudeness and selfishness, heavy traffic, cost of American brands, Konglish, andstupidity. Wow, I never knew those were cultural. What the hell?

I could dissect the list one by one. It would be quite easy. The dreck and bullshit they listed took away from the good tips. Some of the ones that really made me say What the ... Kimchi!?!?! are;

"2. People are usually kind, but sometimes not to African Americans and South-East Asians."

An admission to racism by EPIK. Nice. Racism does seem to have deep roots in Korean culture. I was just surprised by EPIK's admission.

"7. Asking about age and marriage are not seriously personal questions."

This should be appended with "in Korea." In many other countries they are considered personal questions. If you want people to respect your culture then you should be prepared to respect theirs.

One of the things that has always pissed me off is when Koreans pull the "you must understand our culture" card. While that is true to a point you should also respect the culture of others and try to understand them too.

I have participated in more than a few Korean holiday/special event dinners. The kind where you are hammered with "oh this is part of Korean culture". I always went with the flow and respected their customs. I played the proper guest and tasted everything without complaint. When it came to having a traditional Christmas dinner out came the fucking kimchi and rice. Out came the whining. If Koreans couldn't respect ONE of my cultural traditions why the hell should I honour theirs?

"9. Individualism is not preferable. Community spirit comes first."

Community spirt should say CONFORMITY. South Korea has one of the most conformist societies in the world. At times they remind me of lemmings. It is a place where you can make generalizations (Koreans believe) and probably be right.

"13. You may be bothered by children and youngsters who want to speak to foreigners, now and then with bad words which are not intended badly."

So children running up and swearing at you is cultural? Because they don't "intend badly" it is ok? Maybe their parents should teach them some manners?

"17. There are often traffic jams on the roads in rush hours.
18. Drivers sometimes do not yield to pedestrians."

Traffic jams and bad driving are cultural?

"20. You can take a walk at night more safely than western countries because guns are not allowed to posses according to law."

Unless you are accosted by drunken Korean men using their hands, bottles, or knives. Just because a country has strict gun laws doesn't mean they have a low crime rate.

By the way ... guns don't posses people ... people posses guns. Ricetards.

"23. Girls and ladies walk sometimes hand in hand or arm in arm. But they are not leasbians. It means kind of affection."

Hmmmm ... doesn't mention about when the guys do it. Does this mean EPIK admits the guys are gay?

"30. Koreans sometimes say yes when they are confused in speaking English."

Stupidity is cultural? I was always taught that when I didn't understand something I don't say yes.

Then again after the comments of GNP Chairman Kang Jae-Sup during the Mad Cow bullshit about how beef is cultural to Korea, the science doesn't matter, should we be surprised that stupidity is cultural?

Korea ... lean in closer to the monitor.

We need to talk.

Come on. I am a foreigner but I don't bite. Usually. :)

Bring your soju, it's ok. I will even do a few shots with you.

Ready? Ok.

Things like this list make Korea/Koreans look like a bunch of fucktards. Seriously, something done for the ENGLISH Program in Korea can't be properly proof read?

They couldn't find anyone? Not even a Native English teacher who could fix their mistakes? This makes your government program look imcompetent. It enables people to laugh at you and your government. If a department that is supposed to be specialised in English can't get its act together and do things right what hope do any other Koreans have?

The things that appear on this list didn't just appear on a website. That alone should be making you shake your heads and say "Damn. We screwed up." Similar "cultural Tips" appeared in guide books for new EPIK teachers. One of the first things they see when arriving at Korea is stupidity like this.

If you want to claim something is cultural make damn sure it is. Poor driving is cultural? Traffic jams are cultural? Hankuk Saram please!

Yes, it means you will have to listen to a Native English speaker, or horror of horrors someone younger than you who has better English. It also means you won't be putting out stuff that makes you and your country look like a joke.

It would also shut people like me up because we wouldn't have anything to point and laugh at.

Think about it Korea.