RCMP Criminal Background Check

A reader emailed me about his travails getting an RCMP Criminal Background Check, including the vulnerable sector search. He was told "something" showed up in the search and he would have to submit fingerprints to clear it. "Something", according to the RCMP, could have been a similar name or even birthday to an offender.

So, he submitted his prints 2+ months ago. This week he was called to come in. They had his CBC but now, after all the BS and waiting he went through, the RCMP does NOT do the Vulnerable Sector Search if you are getting it for a job OUTSIDE of Canada, even if you are working for a Canadian company abroad. He wasn't told why or when this decision was made, just that it is the new policy.

They gave him a photocopy of some handout which was meant to answer any questions. Why did he have to submit fingerprints when they were going to do the VSS?

"As a result of the enhancement, a Vulnerable Sector Search now requires the submission of fingerprints whenever the gender and date of birth of an applicant match to an existing pardoned sex offender record. This is not an accusation of criminality, but a requirement for a thorough verification to confirm identity and protect personal privacy. In addition to verifying an individual's association with a criminal offence ( including pardoned sex offences) fingerprints are also submitted to CCRTIS for the purpose of certifying an individual does not have criminal record information that can be disclosed in accordance with federal laws."

So if you are a man and have the same birthdate as a sex offender who was pardoned YOU are automatically flagged to be checked. I am all for a deep check, and would have no qualms about submitting to it since I know the fingerprints would clear me, but it just seems a tad anal. You are suspicious because of your gender and birthdate?

If not explained properly to people, and at the cop shop it wasn't explained properly to my reader, it can lead to a lot of headaches for the person. He was thinking his name was flagged for doing something wrong at first and couldn't understand what the hell was going on.

It seems to me that just saying we now do a fingerprint check in all cases would have been a better way to go. Since that is pretty much what they have ended up doing.

And why the hell not do the Vulnerable Sector Search if they are going to work outside of Canada? Wouldn't it be better to make sure they aren't on it before letting them go work with kids or disabled abroad?!?!?

I would be PISSED to no end if I waited almost 3 months for my CBC with VSS to be told in the end that I waited, got fingerprinted, and paid out money to be given just a basic CBC and told I can't get the VSS.

Shit Korean's Say ... about the seasons.

"Did you know that Korea has four distinctive seasons?"

Since it is "the Season" I figured it would be a good time to address the shit Korean's say about the four seasons.

Korean's, old or young, sometimes seem obsessed with the fact their country has four seasons. They seem to think that they are the ONLY country that has four seasons.You will get the strangest looks when you tell them that your country also has four seasons. It is as if they can't believe other countries have them as well.

If you really want to give them a headache tell them that countries like Australia have a winter. They just can't wrap their mind around that one.

They will prattle one about Korea's four distinctive seasons in the most insane places. Writing a book or handout about Muslim food in Korea? Then you just have to bring up Korea's four distinctive seasons. Don't you?

When you add the fact that an older Korean told them Korea has four distinctive seasons and no one else does you get a further problem. If they were told it by a Korean it must be true and any foreigner who says otherwise is wrong. (And I have had Korean adults use similar "logic".)

I had students get irate when I said there were 7 continents. Their KOREAN teacher in school told them there were 6. In the end their only justification for me being wrong is that a Korean told them there were 6. It didn't matter how much evidence you showed them to the contrary, and after the Mad Cow bullshit we all know what Koreans think of things like scientific evidence. The Korean teacher said there were 6 continents so there are 6. So they refused to believe their are 7. This kind of mentality just makes it harder for them to believe that countries other than Korea have 4 distinctive seasons. It also kind of makes them look like morons.

Sorry to burst your bubble Korea but MANY countries have four distinctive seasons.

Season's Beatings

Well, turnabout is fair play.
The Korean Times (The Worst In The Nation) printed a cartoon depicting a US Predator Drone, decked out for Christmas, killing an Arab child.
Flint and I have our response:

Shit Koreans Say ... about things.

Do you know Dokdo?

Do you know Kimchi?

Do you know TaeKwanDo?

Do you know Kim YuNa?

Do you know (insert something Korean here) ?

I wish I had a dollar for every time a Korean used the phrase when talking about something Korean to a foreigner. You would have almost as much money as you would have if you got a dime every time a Korean said they were cold. It is usually used in a way that is grammatically wrong and just sounds inane.

Do you know Kim YuNa?

No, not personally but I have heard about her.

Do you know kimchi? It is a spicy Korean food.

I have lived in korea for 9 years. Are you a moron?

One of my old students, he is in University now, wrote me a letter and said

You know LG? It's one of the korea's global company.

Bad grammar aside, it is a stupid thing to ask someone who has lived in Korea for 9+ years. Of course I know about LG. You can't live in Korea and not know LG. Actually, we talked about Korean companies in a class he attended. Evidently he doesn't remember that.

It is like they think they are telling you some nugget of information that ONLY a Korean would know but that anyone living in Korea would know. And a lot of times if you didn't know it you wouldn't care.

I remember one incident with Korean Christer's. Two women showed up at my door with their bibles. They spoke no English but figured it would be good to natter on in Korean. I ummm conveyed my non-interest to them and they left. Five to ten minutes later my door bell went again. They were back with a dictionary. The first words out of their mouths was ...

Do you know passover?

Seriously? What the kimchi? And if I said yes what would or could they say in English? Or would they expect me to wait while they translated what they wanted to say word for word? Fucking morons. I replied

Yes. And I know Dokdo and couldn't give a fuck about either.

Then I said bye and shut the door. Korean Christians. Gahhhhh!!!!!!

Koreans seem to abuse "Do you know ... ?" more than any other English phrase.

Japanese Korean players choose ... Japan.

One of the latest bugaboos of the Kimchi Kamikaze Kommandoes is that ethnic Koreans in Japan are deciding to declare themselves as Japanese and play for the Japanese National teams in sport like soccer.

The KKKunts have their panties in a bunch over this. One in particular, Indicunt errr Indicut, asked if they were not traitors. (He seems to be the type of person who would declare someone from Australia who does something against American interests a traitor to America.)

So someone declaring their nationality, when they have a choice of two, is a traitor if they don't choose South Korea? Wow. How many traitors are running around in the US or Canada by that standard?

They tried to be "Korean" by South Korean standards, were treated like shit and outsiders, so they decided to declare themselves Japanese. Which was their CHOICE. And according to the KKKunts they are traitors. How dare they not accept being treated like shit and say they are Korean even though Korea doesn't want them.

Of course, when biracial Koreans do well South Koreans are quick to declare them to be "Korean." Look at what the bulls shit Hines Ward's mother went through which made her leave South Korea. She was treated like crap by her family and they were spat at because his father was African-American. Now that he is famous he is wanted.

Once Ward was the Superbowl MVP he was all of a sudden accepted and wanted in Korea. Even Roh MooHyun had to meet with him and acknowledge what a great Korean Hines now was. Not a superstar of some sort and "half Korean" you are scum. become a superstar and all of a sudeen you are Korean and loved.

They had a choice, to declare as South Korean or Japanese. They were treated like shit by South Koreans and choose Japan. Which means they are Japanese. Hard to be a traitor to South Korea when they are Japanese.

Yes, KKKunts, those guys are horrible traitors for choosing their "Japanese" side over their "Korean" side after they were treated like shit by Koreans and not by the Japanese. (Wish I could do an eye roll there.) You stupid fucking mooks. You wonder wonder why they would choose Japan over Korea? Fucking assholes like you! You wonder why people think Koreans are racist? Fucking assholes like you. You wonder why Hines Ward's mothers left Korea with him and still feels animosity to Korea? Fucking assholes like you.

So keep up the bad work and keep giving South Korea and Koreans a bad name.

The Krazy Kimchi Kommandos

A Song Parody By Flint And Stig

(to the tune of Trooper's "The Boys In The Bright White Sports Car")

Here they come,
The Krazy Kimchi Kommandos.
Raging at foreigners.
"Who the fuck do they think they are?"
"Why the fuck did they come this far?"

There they go,
The Krazy Kimchi Kommandos.
Printing all their lies.
It's Kang Shin-who the ass,
And Herr Konsoleman, full of gas.

Ladadada, Ladadada-da.
Ladadada, Ladadada-da.

There they go.
Those dolts are barely thinkin'.
'Cause if they gave it a single thought,
They'd realize they've been drinkin', too much soju!

There they go,
The Krazy Kimchi Kommandos.
Some ajumma called the KKKKops,
Said her virginity had been stolen, stolen!

There they go,
The Krazy Kimchi kommandos,
Raging at foreigners,
"Who the fuck do they think they are?"
"Why the fuck did they come this far?"

Ladadada, Ladadada-da.
Ladadada, Ladadada-da.

What the ... UFO Fanatic?!?!?

Bwahahahahaha .... the Terrible err Korea Times has an article about UFO Fantics!!!! The Korea Times, which has stolen errr reposted stories without proper attribution from many papers around the world about UFO's talking about fanatics? What would one call a paper/editor who seems so obsessed with reprinting, without proper attribution, so many stories about UFO's? (And this one, like some of the others, was the NUMBER TWO headline in the "Korean" paper even though it had nothing to do with Korea.) UFO fanatics? :)