Howdy
Today it really started feeling like home here. We had SNOW! Not a lot, just a light flurry. Of course it didn't staty, but it was a nice change.
Walking around today reminded me of something I find amusing. Some of the English names of places here are very literal translations. For example, there is a bar that in Korean is called the 7 Faces Bar. In English it is called the 7 Face Beer Park. Another translates to Jail Place Bar. It can be amusing.
I was thinking about Law and Order again after reading news about Dartmouth on the internet. In Korea, the beggars are all liscenced, and use a government approved metal box to collect donations. If someone is caught begging or panhandling without their permit they are carted off to jail. They also are not allowed to make any physical contact with peoplen OR their property. While it is sad that people end up in that position all over the world, it would be nice to know that they would not be running up to my car if I was at the Willow Tree in Halifax waiting for the light to change. It is dangerous for them, and annoying for me.
I know in most of my talks I go on about how much I like it here and the things I enjoy. There are things that I do not anjoy, and that I have trouble putting up with.
I almost got into trouble Friday night at a Soju Bar. Some friends and I were there for supper. There were 4 people, 2 men and 2 women, across from us at another table. They seemed to be having fun, and drinking heavy. I heard a noise a while later and looked over to see one of the guys behind a woman pushing her head towards the table. It is hard to describe, sort of like he pushes hard, her head goes forward almost hitting the table and then she jerks back. She didn't seem to be enjoying it, nor did it sound good. Peter and Gary, 2 of the guys at my table got up when I started to move and stopped me. According to them, they saw me look over, saw my eyes narrow, and my back stiffen, and knew I was going to go over. Gary speaks the language so he mentioned something to them. The guy and his girlfriend were "just kidding" around. She said she wasn't being hurt. Then again isn't that what most people who are in abusive relationships say? I still think I should have smacked the guys face into the table like I wanted. He was fairly embarassed and ended up picking up part of our tab as a means of saving face. Still, I would have liked to smash his face. I can't abide seeing a man abuse a woman.
My first night in Korea I almost got into it with a guy for a similar reason. Some of us were coming home from a western bar, the Road King. A woman and her boyfriend were arguing, and she started walking away from him. It looked like he almost yanked her arm out of the socket the way he pulled her back towards him, plus he was yelling at her. I started going towards him and shouted that if he didn't take his F*****G hands off of her I was going to break his F*****G arm. Of course, I didn't think about the fact that he didn't understand English. Duh. Regardless, he seemed to have gotten some message. He got all apologetic and "bowy". (Lots of bowing.) He lost face, and let her go her own way. Unfortunately he probably beat the shit out of her later.
Physical abuse in relationships is a problem here. The men seem to think that a good beating will solve any problem with a woman, and a smack upside the side of the head will smarten a woman up. They coddle their children until they reach about 6 or so, then they taste the same sort of discipline. It is sad to see. I don't expect then to change their culture because I don't like an aspect of it, but is this really cultural? Conversely, I shouldn't be expected to hold back my repugnance at seeing someone abused.
I try to bring food with me to some of my kids classes. Whether it is pizza, or kimbap (think vegetarian sushi), or just a snack. The kids got to school all day, from 8 AM on. Then they go to Hogwa's, private schools, after school. They come to ours to learn English. Go to another for Science. Some of them don't get home until 11 PM, and most of them haven't eaten since noon. The parents feel they are teaching their kids a valuable lesson, and ensuring they have a future with a good education and job. A lot of the kids learn nothing because they don't want to be there. Or can't concentrate properly because they are hungry. To society here, the parents are doing the right thing, and taking proper care of their kids. To me, it seems like they would at least make sure they ate a good meal in the evening. So, I do what I can, when I can. The schools frown on you feeding the kids a lot, because then it will be expected of all the teachers. Which I can understand.
Thats all for now. Next time a lighter topic, I promise.
*******
I did stop bringing food to class as often if at all. In the years after that I would sometimes treat a good class. But it had to be earned. If not they just expect it.
On top of that it isn't oUR job to feed the kids. Their parents SHOULD be making sure they eat properly. not me.
And it turned out all I was told about beggars was bullshit.
I've been in countless fights with Korean men for them bullying their women.
ReplyDeleteSo many people speak about blood money problems, but I've so far never been requested to pay a dime for any punch I threw.
I'm probably just lucky.
Better good luck than bad. :)
ReplyDeleteI haven't had to throw down that often but have been lucky when I have too.
kimbap (think vegetarian sushi) :)
ReplyDeleteHaha, that's a nice way to put it. But you see, you're hurting the Korean sentiments by bringing in Japan.
Bro, it feels really sick when we, the innocent expatriates, find out that most of the "information" told in the initial few days turns out to be BS.
Sick because we got clubbed, figuratively of course.
Ajay
ReplyDeleteI am but a simple thoughtless blue-eyed devil from the west. I regret that what I said could draw Korea-Japan comparisons and all those poor Koreans who will now not sleep at night because I have dishonoured their country. I can only hope those offended restore their honour in the time honoured Korean tradition of seppuku. :)
Ajay
ReplyDeleteDoh! I did it again didn't I? ;)
Seriously though, it is amazing the BS I took at face value. I would like to say that is not like me, but it happened. And then there is the stuff I saw but would ignore to keep a shiny happy outlook.
On the good side finding out that we were feed so much BS and lies does make it harder for us to be fooled again. Well, most of us. The apologists and Koreanphiles will always have their heads up their collective asses.
Haha. Good to see the blinders coming off.
ReplyDeleteIt took a while.
ReplyDeleteThe Kyopo guys tend to be the worst for that. They come back to Korea and then develop strong identity issues Am I western, am I Asian?? I heard the most bullshit from them talking about "respect", "family" etc in absolutes like a fucking Jackie Chan movie. Even outside Korea they (ok, the only 2 kyopos I've met outside Korea,having excluded yuhaksaeng )expect people to use two hands with them. WTF??? This seems to be solely a male Kyopo issue.
ReplyDeleteI have encountered more than a few kyopos over-compensating. I can't remember if I wrote about the kyopo woman who tried to hit me once. Will have to check.
ReplyDeleteMost of the male kyopos I have met complained about the way they are treated by Koreans. They aren't considered true Korean because they didn't do military service or because they didn't grow up in Korea and don't know all the customs.